Abolition + Picking Crops

Well, I’m all for the advancement of colored people, but I do not believe they should advance all the way to the front of this office.

This post is a satirical rebuttal of Bryan Caplan’s article ‘Unschooling + Math’. I want to showcase how his article reads to me. Read his first, then mine. Imagine that the following was written by someone from the early 1860s who was on the fence about freeing slaves.

One popular alternative to slavery is called ‘freedom’. The practice varies, as practices always do. The essence, however, is that the slave does what he wants. He works on whatever he wants, for as long as he wants. If he asks you to teach him something, you teach him. Yet if he decides to go on long walks all day, the principled response based on freedom is: “Let him.”

Almost every slaveholder is horrified by the idea of freedom. Dr Samuel A. Cartwright says slaves only flee captivity because they are mentally ill. Even most slaves shake their heads at the idea of freedom. Advocates insist, however, that freedom works. Psychologists defend the merits of freedom with great vigor and eloquence. According to advocates of freedom, the human slave is naturally curious. Given freedom, he won’t just learn basic skills; he’ll ultimately find a calling.

On the surface, freedom sounds like Social Desirability Bias run amok: “Oh yes, every slave loves to learn, it’s just society that fails them!” And as a mortal enemy of Social Desirability Bias, my instinct is to dismiss freedom out of hand.

One thing I loathe more than Social Desirability Bias, however, is refusing to calm down and look at the facts. Fact: I’ve personally met and conversed with dozens of adults who were born not as slaves but as free men. Overall, they appear at least as productive as typical slaves. Indeed, as psychologists predict, free men are especially likely to turn their passions into useful work. Admittedly, some come across as flaky, but then again so do a lot of people. When you look closely, free people have only one obvious problem.

They suck at picking crops! In my experience, even free men with strong bodies tend to be weak on the field. On the field, I say! Work anyone could do. And their knowledge of more advanced crop-picking techniques is sparser still.

Staunch advocates of freedom will reply: So what? Who needs crop-picking skills? The honest answer though, is: Anyone who wants to pursue a vast range of occupations. Owning a plantation requires knowledge of how to pick crops. Overseeing crop pickers requires that knowledge. So does being a crop-harvesting engineer or a field inspector.

Won’t slaves who would greatly benefit from picking crops choose to learn how to pick crops given the freedom to do so? The answer, I fear, is: Rarely. For two reasons:

First, picking crops is extremely unfun for almost everyone. Only a handful of slaves sincerely finds the subject engaging. I’m a strong guy, and I’ve picked acres of crops, yet I’ve never really liked it.

Second, picking crops is highly cumulative. Each major stage of picking crops builds on the foundation of the previous stages. You need to choose the right crop, prepare the soil for it, plant the seeds, monitor the growth, use proper irrigation and fertilizer, and so on. If you become free and then decide to learn how to pick crops to pursue a newly-discovered ambition, I wish you good luck, because you’ll need it.

What’s the best response? Mainstream critics of freedom will obviously use this criticism to dismiss the entire approach. And staunch advocates of freedom will no doubt stick to their guns. I, however, propose a keyhole solution. I call it: Abolition + Picking Crops.

What does Abolition + Picking Crops mean? Simple: Impose a single mandate on free men. Every day, like it or not, you have pick crops for 1-2 hours. No matter boring you find it, you’re too bad at picking crops to decide that you don’t want to pursue a career that requires picking crops. And if you postpone the study of crop picking for long, it will be too late to start later on.

While most people don’t wind up using much crop picking on the job, ignorance of basic crop-picking skills is still a severe handicap in life. And when strong free men don’t know advanced crop-picking skills, they forfeit about half of all career opportunities.

We should have a strong presumption against slavery – even the literal slavery between a slaveholder and his slave. “Maybe the slave is right and the slaveholder is wrong” is a deeply underrated thought. The value of picking crops, however, is great enough to overcome this presumption. To be clear, I don’t mean that the government should force slaveholders to teach math. What I mean, rather, is that slaveholders should require their slaves to learn how to pick crops. Guilt-free.

I hope my article shows that Caplan is a tyrant who has no idea what freedom means. He presents himself as someone who cares about freedom, as this reasonable guy who wants a balanced approach, but his primary concern isn’t freedom at all. Instead, he wants to grant freedom on his terms: do math for 2 hours and he will grant you freedom for the rest of the day. He wants to prescribe predefined goals and assuage parents’ guilt for using coercion. His concern for their guilt (presumably especially his own) rather than children’s freedom betrays him. Whenever someone from the 1860s showed concern for the guilt slaveholders felt for whipping their slaves, one immediately knew whose side that person was on, no matter how much he pretended to care about freedom. Same goes for anyone’s accidental confession in not immediately recognizing the pretense: you could tell they were on the perpetrator’s side.

The opening quote of this article, from Mad Men, illustrates this dynamic. The show is set in the 1960s, in the middle of the civil-rights movement. The partner of an advertising firm, Bertram Cooper, is on his way out when he notices that a black employee now sits at the front desk. So he approaches his office manager, Joan Harris. The full scene goes:

Cooper: I just wanted to say I was on my way to the club and I noticed there’s been a change in reception.
Harris: I had to shuffle the girls.
Cooper: Well, I’m all for the national advancement of colored people, but I do not believe they should advance all the way to the front of this office. People can see her from the elevator.
Harris: I’m sorry. Do you want me to dismiss her based on the color of her skin?
Cooper: I said nothing of the kind. I’m merely suggesting a rearrangement of your rearrangement.
Harris: Suggesting?
Cooper: Requesting.
Harris: Covers her face in disgust.

You can tell immediately that Cooper does not actually support the “national advancement of colored people” because he wants to make exceptions. It’s just like Caplan pretending when he says “We should have a strong presumption against paternalism […]” (link removed). Yet, in some ways, black people were better off in the 60s than children are today: Harris strongly implies that what Cooper requests is illegal, but there is no law against forced education of children to this day – on the contrary, in many jurisdictions, the law demands such force. And what Cooper does is still better, in way, than what Caplan does: at least Cooper doesn’t pretend that his ‘request’ is for the black employee’s own good.

Overriding a child’s preferences for his benefit is a contradiction in terms. If learning math is such a good idea, persuade your child. If you fail, then not learning math is his prerogative, just like it is yours not to pick crops, even though people in the 1860s considered it an extremely useful skill. Free people will naturally learn whatever math their own unique problem situation requires, when it requires it, and the scope and timing is going to be different for everyone. The reason most people don’t do that today is that teachers ruin their relationship with math: a self-fulfilling prophecy. If a teacher leaves children no other way to assert their freedom than to reject math, then that is what they will do, and the teacher has no right to be surprised or complain.

Caplan writes: “Every day, like it or not, you have to do 1-2 hours of math.  No matter how boring you find the subject, you’re too young to decide that you don’t want to pursue a career that requires math.” He implies that some amount of force is warranted to enforce this edict since he won’t let children disagree. How much force? Does he advocate yelling at one’s child? Maybe taking away privileges and toys? Or would he go even further? He does not specify: bad ideas hide in the unstated.

Freedom is indivisible and allows absolutely no compromises. You cannot balance freedom: it’s all or nothing. There are better and worse forms of slavery, but only one type of freedom. Caplan is a good example of the Randian insight that even the smallest compromise on basic principles or moral matters is a complete surrender. An honest man who steals once in a while is not an honest man, as Ayn Rand implied. A free man who has to pick crops 1-2 hours a day is not a free man. A free child who has to learn math 1-2 hours a day is not a free child. The whole point of unschooling is (or should be!) freedom, not productivity or career choices or “merits” or that freedom “works” or whatever. Mix unschooling and forced math lessons and you end up with no unschooling at all.

If society progresses in the way I hope, then Caplan’s article will age exceptionally poorly. As it deserves.